Castle Whiterock log 25 July 2022: Instant sashimi

The murderhoboes

Garreth, half-orc swordsman
    Bleu, droning elf wizard
Zaber, suave and debonaire man
    Logan, wolverine
Polly, cute and deadly elf archer
Thrognar, half-orc holy warrior

What they did

Back in Cillamar, I hear tales of an aquatic gargoyle that lives on the wall, and of seakittens that can stab people at great speed. Chauntessa herds the whole group off to Whiterock while the townsfolk fix Cillamar after we spend the week there.

We go back to where we fought the eels, and check out the wall where I felt some tingling and Logan smelled something good. The wall looks like a way into tunnels. The narrow passage winds its way into the cliff side before going into a natural cavern. The walls are rough and jagged, and the uneven floor is strewn with rocks and boulders. I put on my ring and check it out. Once I walk in, I get a tingling and Logan smells something. I see a black pudding in a crag to my left attached to the ceiling waiting above the rotting corpse of an electric eel. I gather it's laying in wait for someone to come nearer so it can drop on him. Since there's no bling in sight, I step out, take off my ring, and signal "Danger" to the others.

Garreth swims to the surface of the water, and we all follow. He asks me what I saw, and I tell him about the black pudding. He asks Bleu about the black pudding, and she says, "It is akin to Inky Lord, but much smaller. They are most susceptible to cutting damage, but they are known to dissolve or stick to weapons. One suggested method is to carry a bunch of weapons so you can trade off. They have been known to collect treasure to lure prey. You can of course use bows or magic as well."

Garreth asks how smart they are. Bleu says, "Animal intelligence, like a wolf." Garreth asks if it has loot, and Bleu says, "It's possible, yes. Puddings are known to be very affectionate and quite willing to embrace people as well. The Great Naturalist Erwin Stephens did many studies of them until constant resurrections proved to exceed his grant money."

Polly says, "This is boring. We should go kill it or go past it, or kill it and go past it."

I say, "Everything Blah talks about is boring. Let's check to see if it has treasure without prodding it. If it does, we kill it. If not, we ignore it." We all agree to ignore it and go back down. 

Once down, we spot a bunch of sailfish coming out of the blabberwort forest and streaking through the water towards us. Garreth readies his trident, Thrognar focuses his chi, Logan steps and waits in the mouth of the tunnel, and I put on the ring.

The sailfish charge at us. One fish comes towards me and I stab it in the eyes, killing it. Four of them miss Garreth, of which one also misses me and Thrognar parries it. Then another two charge Garreth, missing him, and one also goes past Polly. Polly gets out of the way of another fish, while one almost hits me were it not for the dwarven beer can that hits its tusk first.

Polly pulls out her rapier and waits. Garreth grumbles and steps, dropping the trident and fast drawing Scalemar. Then he focuses, getting his sword to cast Great Haste on him. I step into the tunnel and start putting on my ring again. Logan waits for a fish to come into reach. Thrognar steps and waits for a fish to come near. One does, and Thrognar swings twice. His blade parts the sailfish like the Red Sea, half a fish fillet on each side. Polly cleaves a skull in with her rapier. A sailfish swims at Bleu, but Garreth gets his sword in the way. Another one goes for Polly, but Garreth parries that one, too, and parries the next one that tries the same to Polly as well. Thrognar parries one coming towards him, while Logan tries to gouge out the eyes of a sailfish going for him. Another fish goes for Polly, but she dodges, while Garreth has to parry a fish that goes after him. A last fish misses Garreth wholly.

Polly hits the confused fish in the skull, splitting it open, then steps. Garreth chops up five fish, making instant sashimi in a second.

Game log 17 July 2022: Who are you?

Personae dramatis

Tulip, elf bard
Grignok, orc druid
Felcanis, elf cleric
Honsou, larcenous bowman

Quid occurrit

They search the old bedroom, but find nothing. Felcanis casts Stop Bleeding on Mēnévē, Grignok, and herself, then Grignok turns Mēnévē into a tree with Plant Form Other and heals her with Heal Plant. "Piddy iddin hep wid my doze," says Mēnévē. They hole up there and rest for 10 hours, with Grignok casting Mystic Mist and Felcanis casting Watchdog. Grignok also turns Felcanis into a tree with Plant Form Other, casts Heal Plant to heal her, then turns her back so she can cast Major Healing on Grignok and Minor Healing on Honsou.

They go back to the hallway, and wind their way to the stairs up a level. From there, they walk past the stairs and the stub of the rope pointing upwards, through the door, past a broken holy symbol of Saundīvós, to the edge of the water. Honsou pulls out some rope and Grignok casts Body of Slime on himself and goes into the water, pulling the rope behind him. He goes into the flooded room to his right and sees the hole. In the hole, he finds a jar, which he takes and brings back to the others. They open it and find a bunch of coins.

Grignok goes back into the water. He goes farther inward then sees a hallway going left, which he takes. After a short jaunt through an empty room and some twists, he makes it into the big cavern, and sees a landing to his left. On the landing is a slim man in leather armor, with a broadsword at his side. The man peers at Grignok's slimy body. "What are you?"

Grignok asks him, "Who are you?"

The man sizes up Grignok. "My name is unimportant." Grignok puffs out his chest and asks why is whatever he his important. "You have no weapon. I've seen so many creatures of the water down here, but I've never seen one like you. Quit wasting my time and go away."

The man says nothing more although Grignok keeps trying to chat him up. So Grignok casts Lightning and slaps him in the back. This shocks him and makes him fall. Grignok tries to grab his sword but cannot, so the man jumps up. Grignok grabs him, and he wiggles away, "Go away, slimy cheater!"
Grignok gets a better grip. "I just wanted to talk! You had to be mean, like all the others. Now we're gonna hug it out."

The man cannot get out of his grasp. "What do you want to talk about, monster?"
Grignok asks, "What's your name?"

The man thinks, then shakes his head. "I don't remember anymore. It has been too long." Grignok asks why he's there, and he says, "To kill fight the best and kill cheaters." He asks Grignok to let him go, and instead Grignok squeezes tighter, cracking his ribs, and the man passes out. Grignok grabs his sword, and it burns his body.

After about five minutes since the last time everyone saw him, Grignok comes back, holding a sword. Grignok tosses the sword down. "Look what I found." Felcanis picks up the sword. It doesn't hurt her, and she puts it on the mule. 

Grignok casts Heal Plant on himself. After this, he rests for awhile, then casts Body of Slime again to go back in the water to check out the last bend past the first two happways. He takes the bend going right, then swims a little farther into a room. In there are two bunk beds nailed to the floor, made of a crude iron for some reason, thus rusting. He goes out, and goes right around the corner, which itself is a small room. There he sees old racks for scrolls in that bend, but doesn't check them out.

After turning right, he goes towards the room at the end of the hall, and sees some movement straight ahead. He sees there are two giant piranhas, but they swim past him since he's a plant. He gives a piranha a pat, and the piranha wiggles past the pond scum touching it. He goes into the room and checks out a marble pillar there. The piranhas swim in their room, waiting for more flesh.

Grignok goes back to room at the corner. There is an old wardrobe, the wood oddly not rotten. He opens the wardrobe, and finds himself in a thicket outdoors, among the rotten and withered trees from the area outside the keep. He casts Mystic Mist around himself and rests up for almost an hour. Once rested, he casts Shapeshifting on himself and turns into a panther.

Felcanis grows concerned about Grignok, so she leads the group out of the dungeon. They get out, and it's about midnight. No patrols outside that they can see. After about an hour for Felcanis and the party after leaving the dungeon or 90 minutes for Grignok after teleporting out, the group and the panther run into each other. Felcanis sets up camp.

Castle Whiterock Log 18 July 2022: Totally drained

The murderhoboes

Garreth, half-orc swordsman
    Bleu, droning elf wizard
Zaber, suave and debonaire man
    Logan, wolverine
Polly, cute and deadly elf archer
Thrognar, half-orc holy warrior

What they did

Logan upon smelling good food moves in on the wrecked tower, and clouds of giant eels rise up from the rubble. He bites an eel and eats it. Logan holds the eel body in his mouth, dangling limply. I turn, step, and stab another eel in the head, felling it in one stroke. Garreth focuses inward, bringing out the inner speed.

Bleu steps and looks at the eels. "Ah, these are Gymnotidae Electrophorus, also known as electric eels. They use an electric discharge to stun or kill prey, live in freshwater habitats, and particularly enjoy eating people in metal armor. Jellied eels are a particular delicacy in Elven culture, and the smaller eels work well when baked in pies. The larger specimens are also known to grapple their prey. They are known to be particularly susceptible to heavily armored clerics with Resist Lightning, as the eels love metal armored targets and will often target them. Not that elves make a habit of attacking them, as they are natural creatures. However, their habit of hiding in small places and trying to eat people has been known to lead to unfortunate conflicts."

Polly says, "I really wish I had my bow." She pulls out her rapier, then rushes over to a big eel, hitting it twice and killing it with the second blow. An eel swims up to Garreth, then nips at him, shocking him and stunning him. Two other ones do the same to Logan and me, but we shun the shock. Swarms of little eels go around us, trying to shock us, but hardly arousing a tickle.

Logan chomps on the swarming little eels around him. I stab the big eel near me in the brain before swatting my knife at a few little ones. Garreth snaps aware, kills a big eel, and wounds another. Bleu casts Resist Lightning on Garreth, and Polly swings at the swarms near her. A big eel swims towards Garreth and lets out a shock, but it does nothing to him. The swarms around Logan, Polly, and me all let out more shock, and this time it hurts Polly and me.

Polly, Logan, and I fight through our pain and chop up little eels, while Garreth gets a big one before chopping baby eels as well. A big one swims up to Logan and tries to shock him, but doesn't hurt him, while another comes up and zaps me. However, the little ones shock the hell out of Polly, Logan, and me.

Logan munches down some of the swarm, while I pull out my potion of great healing and chug it. Garreth chops up a big one, and Polly fights through her pain and chops up a swarm. Bleu swims towards her. The big eels turn and look like they're gathering power. The swarms zap Logan, Polly, and me, but we all chop back.

Garreth kills two more big ones near me, and Bleu swims towards me. A big eel swims up to me and gives me a zap, but I stay up. Swarms swim up to Polly, Logan, and me and shock us. This doesn't bother Logan much and he munches through the eels, while Polly and I also chop back. It hurts, but then I feel Bleu's hand cast Resist Lightning on me, letting me watch Garreth chop up another big one.

The swarms zap Garreth, Polly, and me, but none of it hurts us now. I chop up some baby ones, and Logan pounces on a big one's skull, ripping out its brain and lapping it up with a big lick. Garreth and Polly chop up the last baby eels near them, while Garreth and I easily handle the last ones.

We drink from the bag of healing, then I search the rocks. In them, I find a bunch of coins, some wrecked armor, and a suit of blue plate armor with a seashell-like design and fine mail webbing on the sollerets and gauntlets. Linked to this suit by a silver lanyard is a golden trident. They are magical, needless to say. To top off our funds Polly gathers up a bunch of eel skins to sell to make elven eel pies. Then we go back to town, our bag of healing drained.

Castle Whiterock log 11 July 2022: Eely annoying

The murderhoboes

Garreth, half-orc swordsman
    Bleu, droning elf wizard
Zaber, suave and debonaire man
    Logan, wolverine
Polly, cute and deadly elf archer
Thrognar, half-orc holy warrior

What they did

In town, Thrognar fills up his emergency major healing potion and goes to the town orphanage and drops off 9,000 copper farthings. This makes the orphans happy. Afterwards, he and Garreth take the blabberwort to Quintus. Quintus claps his hands and smiles widely once he sees the blabberwort. "Ah! Splendid! Blabberwort! Come back in a while and I will have the herbicide for you. It is too bad Stonemaul is not here. Dwarven hatred works well in herbicide."

Garreth blinks. "I got plenty of hatred right here."

Quintus says, "Well, think hateful thoughts while crouching down really low." Garreth growls low and angry and sees swirling images of the hydra melting and dissolving in the brew.  Quintus pats him on the back. "That's the spirit!" Then, he moves carefully away from Garreth. "Try thinking about plants, not just the hydra." Garreth thinks about that hydra then pushes his hatred towards the mana-eating plants in his memory. 

He stays that way for a couple days beside the cauldron before wandering off to get riotously drunk and wrestle with Logan. Then he sleeps for the rest of the week, waking only to eat.

I spend the week hiding out, drinking in the gutter. After a few days, the bar owners are putting up missing persons posters. I see my face drawn on a pitcher of milk, and then find the artist and bid him to do a better job. The artist says, "I'm sorry Zaber, but the best artist in town, Lord Flitwick, has gone missing." So I draw a crude camel on the milk jug, and label it, "Wickprick." After a few hours I hear hearsay that I'll turn into a camel if I ever sober up.

I go looking for Seépravir to find out where Flitwick is, or if she has a spell that can help me get Flitwick's daughter into bed. Seep is busy ascending to a higher plane of consciousness, so I just get plastered instead, dance in my underwear at the bar, and sleep with a barmaid. The barmaid looks much less like an elf princess when I wake up, so I shudder. "Happens every time."

Sometime later as the sun beams down Chauntessa comes up to me. "I think that's enough antics for this week, Zaber. It's the weekend and time for you to get Garreth and your other friends and head back to Whiterock. My staff might work themselves to death if you stayed around over the weekend."

I ask her, "Can you get me my clothes? Your barmaid stole them." I run outside in my undergarments to everyone's laughter, and Chauntessa announces a scavenger hunt to find my clothes. Folks find my clothes over half the town over the next few hours, while I gather with Thrognar and Garreth at the Slumbering Drake. "I really should settle down and get drunk with the same woman every night. Avoid surprises for what awaits me when I wake."

Chauntessa laughs. "If you drank with the same girl every night they'd die of alcohol poisoning, it's going to be days before my barmaid dries out enough to work." I point out that none of the other patrons drink enough to sleep with her, so she should be safe. Garreth says I should hook up with a half-orc woman, and Thrognar says I should pick a dwarf woman. Neither seem right. "I'd toss the dwarf woman. The half-orc woman would toss me."

We drag Logan out of the pantry of the Slumbering Drake, and Chauntessa has folks find Polly and bring her back. With them together, we set forth for the lake again. Garreth leads us back to the room where we fought the eel and merrow. 

In the room, we find a ratty old giant clam shell against the wall. When we move it, we find a small alcove. I look a little more, and inside we find an eelskin pouch, a metal rod about two feet long with many dents in it, a flash, and a bunch of big fish jaws. I look at the rod for a moment, and realize this isn't the fabled Rod of the Hedgehog. I hand it to Bleu, who takes it and hands it to Garreth.

Garreth taps the rod against a nearby wall then swings it around. It's kind of graceful as a mace, but not as a two-handed sword. Then he holds it up against the clamshell and the dents match the clamshell. "This was used to pry and prop open dire clams. Let's keep an eye out for more clams. You wouldn't keep a tool like this around unless you had a purpose." He slides the rod into the Bag of Holding.

I ask Blah if any of this is magical, and she says it isn't. I look in the pouch and find a bunch of big pearls: white, smokey, and black. I also find a small pouch holding some smooth pebbles. Garreth says that you'd use the pebbles to start clams in growing pearls.

I also notice a twisty small passage wending its way into the rubble that the eel was hiding in. Garreth, Logan, and I squeeze in while Thrognar keeps watch at the entrance. After I walk a few feet, I feel the hair on the back of my head stand up. I look around me, as well as above and below. Up ahead I spot the flickering bodies of many baby eels. Beyond them I notice a scroll case with green gems glinting off it. The eels look at me with open mouths, like they haven't been fed in a week. Logan looks back at the eels, also thinking they are tasty.

I hide, and the eels start to back off. Logan runs forward and eats the eels with a minimal shock. The tunnel is a place of carnage, blood, and dismembered floating bits of electric eel misery. I grab the scroll case, slimy with eel bits. It is pewter-worked with emeralds.

We get out and I show the scroll case to Blah, who tells me that it is a Scroll Case of Power that grants three energy for casting scrolls left in it overnight and holds ten scrolls. I sarcastically say that it sounds exciting, which makes Bleu almost excited. She helpfully tells me all about the Power spell, which is related to Recover Energy. I pretend to listen, and nod.

We go north past the hydra lair and find a pile of rubble that seems like it might have once been a tower. We see the sweeping wall heading off to the West and check it out. We keep going west, and it bends a little to the southwest, and see the back door to the room where we drank in the bubbles.

Not far past the back door, we find a hunk of the wall that has fallen into a pile of shifting white rock rubble. The barren landscape is pockmarked by clumps of plant growth here and there, and swarms of tiny fish dart in and out of the rocky crevices.

I don't see anything hazardous, but feel tingly. I check things out, usual full circle and above/below look. I circle around, hey, there are more interesting rocks over there too, around the corner. I move more warily towards there. I check the currents … something has me on edge

I have Logan smell, and he gets excited. I slip towards the bend, and let Logan swim to eat whatever it is in the pile of rocks.

Castle Whiterock 27 June 2022: In the colony of Slippermen

The murderhoboes

Garreth, half-orc swordsman
    Bleu, droning elf wizard
Zaber, suave and debonaire man
    Logan, wolverine
Polly, cute and deadly elf archer
Thrognar, half-orc holy warrior
(Stonemaul, half-orc holy warrior)

What they did

I belch. "Hey, let's get that blabbermouth stuff for Quint!" The Aquan potion still is working, so everyone understands me.

Thrognar says, "Agreed. Where was the blabberwort again?" Polly and I both point him towards the blabberworts. "Then let's be off. Thank you for your hospitality, pixies."

Caendril yells at him, "NIXIES!"

Thrognar blushes. "Sorry, a vocal typo."

Garreth nods. "We'll see you again!"

We walk over to the blabberwort stocks. Garreth tells Thrognar that the plant is hostile, but Polly says, "It was just hungry and thought we were delicious. Probably." I slip between the blabberwort plants and use my knife to harvest seven fronds oozing with acidic goodness.

We go back towards the nixen lair, but veer left. We think we see a secret door in the wall. Bleu gets a good look. "As you can see, the sedimentation pattern here shows that this has undergone gradual buildup over the course of … " So on, so forth, "… that area however has been disturbed by actual hands to conceal an entrance in the otherwise natural rock formation."

Garreth says, "So that means a secret door?

Thrognar asks him, "Does she always go on like this?"

Garreth shrugs. "I hired her for water breathing and flight and stuff. Brevity wasn't a required qualification. She's great at what she does."

Bleu keeps babbling. "From the indentations you can see it clearly also houses spear traps. The spear traps appear to be a design of class 7 spears often associated with ogres." Bleu lectures us about ogre spear designs of the past several centuries.

I tell her the truth: "I like you better when you don't talk, Bleu." I go up to the door and disarm its trap.

Thrognar asks, "Shall we see what's hidden behind the door?"

Polly looks at me. "Sure! Maybe there's orks."

I give Polly a shit-eating grin and open the door.

It is hard to see how high the ceiling is in this big room, as there are many nets are strung up along most of it, as well dangling from an archway. The nets are clogged with brown and green bits of algae. Ahead of us there is a pile of jagged rocks in what looks to have been more of the room. Along the righthand wall is a big pile of dead plants and soft tufts of bright green algae.

Garreth hypnotizes himself.  I go in and start swim upwards to check out the nets, but I spot a 20-foot-long eel ahead. I flip it off to see if it understands or even sees, more to the point. The hair on the back of my head stands on end, so I go no farther towards it.

The eel looks at me and sparks. "Funny, I didn't know it knew body Common!" We all pull out our weapons, and it sparks more. I keep feeling tingling, so I hold up my hand to hold everyone back, and wait for it to come to us. Thrognar steps and summons godly might.

I feel something coil about snugly from behind and grapple me. The great fishy beast coiling around me hacks at Logan with its halberd, but he gets out of the way. It also swings at Bleu, but she Blinks away, and Logan steps away from the rest of its blows. The eel swims up and lets out an electric shock, wounding all of us, and stunning Garreth and Logan, though Garreth snaps back fast.

Polly readies her buckler and new rapier and swims in reach of the eel. I try to cut the merrow but cannot hurt it through the pain. Thrognar stabs the eel in the eye, killing it, and gets his sword out before it gives off a dying shock. It shocks the rest of us, leaving Polly and me stunned as well as Logan.

The merrow hurls me at Thrognar. Thrognar drops his sword, reaches out, and grabs me, twisting in the water to stall the momentum. I am a bit dizzy and fall from his grip. It then swims forward swiftly, grabs Logan with its tail, and slashes at Polly four times with its halberd. It looks like she's dead but somehow is still standing.

Garreth slashes at the merrow and Bleu casts Great Haste on him. His second blow hits, knocking it out. Polly snaps awake and kills it before it can wake.

We heal up. Garreth pulls out the bag of healing potions, and Thrognar drinks a potion of Major Healing. After about twenty swigs between us, we're all healed.

Garreth asks Bleu, "What is that thing that attacked us? Is it worth talking to?"

Bleu tells Garreth, "It is a Merrow, a type of Sea Ogre. Normally they are extremely dumb, however according to Von Hofflestein's Postulate only the dumb ones are observed as intelligent ones stay away from civilization and adventuring parties. According to the Magnimus Cranius, Magnimus Brainius Law it may be intelligent, like a dragon, however, some arguments hold this is not true, as ogres and minotaurs are less sagacious. We could extract its brain and unfold it to see, a more wrinkled brain encodes more information by the Dwarven Engraving Movement."

I poke Logan and whisper in his ear, then he goes up to Bleu and licks her face again and again. She at last gets that Logan is licking her and looks at me. "Why is your mustelid licking my face?"

I tell her the truth. "Because I think it's funny."

Bleu says, "Please, this is a serious delve"

Garreth blinks at Bleu as Logan licks her face again. "What made you think that? You're in a dungeon with a drunken master and a wolverine."

I add, "And a master drunk."

Polly adds, "And an elven archer!"

Bleu helpfully gives examples of Delving Law, going back to the 74th Legislature of Mondrian.

I ask the others if they want him to stop. They don't say anything, so I laugh until I am bored, then I wave at Logan to stop.

Thrognar asks Bleu if if anything of the eel is worth something. Bleu says, "You can attempt to harvest the electric organs. They can be sold or used to fashion lightning javelins or the like." I take a look at the merrow body, and I find that it's wearing eelskin armor and a shiny silver ring. I beckon Bleu over and she says that those are magical, as well as the dueling halberd it wielded, made from hydra fangs. Carved into the halberd are some words in Dwarven, which I read:

"To my friend and supplier Trosk -Impresario
"May yours nets prove ever bountiful"

I shrug. "Mistah Trosk, he dead." We go back to Cillamar to get Polly's Bless renewed.